It’s hard to manage my former co-workers.

I was recently promoted to manage a group of employees who used to be my coworkers. However, I’m finding it difficult to supervise people who were my peers for several years. As their manager, I feel that I should be demonstrating stronger leadership skills, but I’m not sure how to go about this. How can I become more effective in this position?

Marie’s Answer

Like most new supervisors, you’re suffering from “imposter syndrome”. Although you’ve been given a management title, you are not yet comfortable in the role, so management tasks can seem unfamiliar and awkward. Supervising former peers usually makes this transition even more unsettling.

To successfully adapt, you must initially engage in some on-the-job role-playing. This simply means that you need to act like a manager even though you don’t quite feel like one yet.

Begin by meeting individually with team members to discuss their jobs and agree on expectations. Express appreciation for their contributions and encourage them to come to you with any problems they may have. Speak with confidence during these conversations, even if you’re still feeling slightly shaky.

To be most effective, you will need to recognize how your leadership style is shaped by your natural personality. Management is a complex job, and every manager has a unique combination of strengths and weaknesses. While some of your natural behaviors and traits will work well, others may require some modification.

Seek out leadership tips from books, videos, podcasts, or seminars – but only take advice from people who have actually worked in management. Unfortunately, many self-proclaimed “experts” have never actually managed anyone.

Finally, be on the lookout for helpful role models whom you view as effective leaders. Seasoned managers possess a wealth of practical knowledge which they are often quite happy to share.

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